A Christmas in Peru

After a long journey to Chachapoyas, then to the overwhelming city of Chiclayo, I eventually returned to Guadalupe to pass Christmas with the Ramirez family. I arrived at 5:30 on the evening of the 24th, sweaty and red from the Sun and streets of the city. Oh Guadalupe! Small town of wonderful friends. After dumping my stuff in a corner under the stairs, I waited with everyone else until midnight.

In Peru, christmas starts when the clock strikes twelve. In the house of the Ramirezes, the chubby golden hearted eight year old chris was counting the minutes by jumping on couches and giving updates on the passage of time. Slowly the table was set with salads and sides and flowers and panetons, then finally glasses filled with champagen. As twelve struck firecracks popped in the streets and we all gathered around the table. With glasses raised we went around the table with the giving toasts, taking sips of sweet champaign, until every person had given thanks. Then dinner of turkey and deliciousness comenced, with coffee and spiced hot chocolate and wine and other comestibles of various levels of high desirability.

After dinner the tables were moved aside and a dance party commenced. Like all events I have attended everybody danced. Beer was passed around and around and around and around. At 3 30 in the morning a few of us left to the Discotec. We danced for an hour with friends until finally the lights came on and out came two strippers on a stage in front of a pool. The guy was danced as Santa and the woman as.... uh... a present? I´m not a big fan of strippers, to be honest, but it was interesting way to pass christmas, so I shimmied to the side near the front to watch. The dance didn´t last long, and soon a guy with the microphone announced that they needed two volunteers. I was looking around the large group assembled when the female stripper grabbed my arm and pulled me to the front of the pool, facing everyone. Holy crap. My face was already red from a sunburn, but it turned even redder as I contemplated the possibilities of what I was now supposed to do. My first thought was, why did I have to wear my most unflattering, worn through the seems, semi see through underwear? I was quite preoccupied while they found another male and two more female ´volunteers.´The women went first. There was lap dancing and imitation sex. I was turning redder by the second, antipating the worst. Finally the time came and the female strip brought me to the front of the pool, in the bright light, and whispered in my ear just do what I do which was a relief: I didn´t need to get naked or pretend to hump on the ground in front of a crowd of people. Problem was, she was as lithe as a snake. I tried to imitate her dance moves but next to her probably looked like robot. But I shook my arse and wiggled my shoulders and swiveled my hips as best as I could and soon it was all over. I kept thinking, of course, this had to happen to me. It wasn´t even because people thought I was a gringo: I was announced as a Guadalupano. What luck!

Anyhow, the dancing continued well into the light of morning. I left at 8am and on the way home ran into some friends who were returning from the disco as well. I walked them to their street where we ran straight into a street party that was still going strong. A stereo had been dragged out into the street and beers were being circulated with great dedication to the sacred art of drunken celebration. So we joined them. In the corner of the street I noticed a giant paper mache cow.

Early in the evening, before christmas started, there was a competition of paper mache cows. Street communities, and groups of friends, and children all made big paper mache cows and marched through the streets. I watched from my friends Juice bar as they came parading by with tin cans banging and the giant fake cows bouncing crazily past us.

Anyhow, at some point me and a drunk curly haired brother of a friend hoisted the cow over our heads and made it dance cumbia to the pleasure of all. After much dancing I had to take a piss. I entered the house of my friend and when I returned the same curly haired brother and smashed a beer bottle and gotten into a fight with his cousin. Brothers and mothers and uncles and neighbors had wrestled them apart. There was blood on tshirts and broken glass on the ground. As soon as the curly haired brother had been taken away, laughter erupted and the drinking and celebration continued.

Finally at 3pm, i fell asleep. While not the most family friendly christmas I´ve had, it was definitely the most fun and interesting of my life.

friends. Murphy, Rachel, Mohammed



Plaza de Armas, christmas decoration.